The Anti-Consumer Hypocrite

So there's plenty of things I'm known for, making my own shoes from carrots I grew in my garden is one of the funnier ones my girlfriend Janeille coined, but one of the lesser known ones is that I'm a bit of an Anti-consumer hypocrite... sad but true.

I'm constantly tortured in my head, knowing that Forever 21 just got in that perfect dress that is gonna suit my not-so-perfect figure and I'm gonna miss it! But I know that I have no business being in that store because my closet is full and once I'm there, there's at least 5 other things I can't live without, ughhh!!! It's places like Nordstroms rack that convince the anti-consumer hypocrites like me that it's OK because that dress was $130 and now is only $11 so it's not really that bad, right!!!!

In an ideal world I would just be content with what I have and never need anything shinny and new. But no, I'm tortured, I'm tossed to and fro all the time. I can't, but I would love to blame it all on Orange County, I mean shopping might be highest on our list of cultural priorities.

So my friends, it's only fair that you share the burden with me, so I'm gonna do what any good anti-consumer hypocrite would... Give you the two options to wrestle over that I do, everyday!
You're welcome :)

Let the torture commence:

This month, charity: water is doing a campaign, encouraging people to give up their September birthday gifts in exchange for a donation to charity: water. They hope to further solve the world water crisis, and so far, they're doing a killer job! Good thing it wasn't October birthdays this year, phew!
Watch the trailer, I'm pretty sure you'll become an Anti-Consumer hypocrite too... sorry. And don't worry, I am gonna give up my October birthday this year :)


Next is for those of you who can shop online unimpeded by that nagging feeling.
Zafirenia is a really cute company I just learned about. Seriously cute, cute vintage inspired jewelry.

Did I say cute. I love their big, bold fun designs.

I really wanted to get one for my best friend's birthday, but she has to make the ever torturous call, since it's her September birthday, no pressure.


If you decide you can't live without one of Zafirenia's designs, you can make yourself feel better knowing that you're supporting the cottage industry and actually putting food on a family's table :)

I know, I know, I would say I'm sorry, but all kidding aside I think this is too important. So much of what we do in America needs a bit of a reevaluation. At the very least I've gotten you thinking, cuz if you never did, nothing would change.

Balance my friend, balance.

Your Old Time Friend

A Shout Out!

This is a Shout Out to all you single moms out there! I've had 10 days with my husband gone to Australia and New Zealand, and I have to say I have a new found respect and admiration for those of you doing this all the time! I pray strength and courage for you! I'll be back soon, I'm bubbling over with things I have to tell you... but not now, I got stuff to clean :)

The Basics of our Faith

As I sit here and ponder all of the pearls of insight into the depths of my soul that I could share right now, I'm coming up short... I'm still right in the thick of processing all the ins and outs of Behavior Modification, so I'm finding it hard to exactly articulate my thoughts... I know that God is in the midst of doing surgery, but one thing that I feel affirmed in over and over again in throughout this process is, that even as I screw up and learn lesson after lesson because of my shortcomings, I'm loved and accepted. I'm beloved and cherished because of Jesus and not because I'm a perfect little saint that never screws up... if that were how God worked, I would be screwed!

For that reason, I LOVE this video!



Let me know your thoughts, or how you've experience this grace in your life!
I know the hardest part for me is to just accept it, even when I do screw up, there's some arrogance in me that just wants to earn His love so bad. But when I take a step back, I'm so glad I can't! Because when I'm totally honest with myself, I know I never could, I know I don't measure up to His standards, so I'm just grateful for His acceptance and grace on Jesus' behalf!

Behavior Modification?

Well, well, well... if you're still reading 3 gold stars for you!

Sorry I've been a lagger, but life for the Weeks have been busy! There's been the executing of an estate, lots of worship leading, good friends in from out of town, entertaining, meetings up the wazoo, veggie gardening and of course lots of watching Judah eat sand! But all along I haven't forgotten you, I think of you often and wonder if you think of me ;)

OK enough with the mushy stuff...

Amidst all the business there has been a lot on my mind! The one that has dominated my thoughts is the whole idea of behavior modification that I eluded to in my post's title,this has had HUGE implications for me in my life lately, on so many levels!

I promise an explanation or at least an attempt at one in my next post. But for now I'm posting the video that's has really challenged me in my usual attempts at behavior modification for y'all to watch, and no I'm not from the south... well Southern California, but we don't say y'all, I don't know what came over me.



We have so much to discuss! Talk to you soon!

Race day approaching!

So I have vaguely eluded to the fact that I've taken up a regular exercise regimen here before, but I haven't really gotten into the details, cuz lets face it, if you wanted to read an exercise blog, you probably wouldn't be reading mine with such items as "Brown butter plum tart" and "Spreads"...

However I am planning on completing my first ever half-marathon this Sunday, and I'm really excited... I actually don't feel any of the dread that I should!

I was just telling my mom the other day how amazing it is that I even want to attempt running... I mean, I'm an adult! There's no scary PE teacher screaming at me to get going any more! I have rights now... When I was a kid there was no better way to torture or punish me. I saw kids that voluntarily signed up for cross country and I thought there was something wrong with them! But by some miracle I came to the conclusion that running would be a good idea for me.

(She is amazing! Look how much clearance she has!, does anyone think this is real??)

Then an interesting conversation ensued with my mom about the misconceptions we grow up with and often never get over even as adults, until we're forced to stare them down by circumstances that are unavoidable, ever had one of those?
I had a huge misconception about running. I labeled it as impossible, too hard for my stubby round body, torture.

Then I told my mom about a recent victory I'd had over a long-time misconception of mine...

My whole life I had looked at this one hill near my house (I still live in the house I was born in) and marveled at people running up it. I had thought to myself, "why would anyone do that, that is the hill of death."
Well sometime after I had started running, I needed to get to a location that was really close, but the only way to get there was up the "hill of death!" I put it of for weeks, telling myself it was just too hard for me. Finally, one day I decided to kick myself in the pants, and I gave myself a whole hour to complete "the hill" and amazingly enough I arrived 40 min. early.
It's amazing how crippling our misconceptions are! I've wasted so many years of my life investing in lies! How sad!

( I could be totally wrong, but I think this photo is a lie... how bout you??)

Now, this is no power of positive thinking pep talk, it's a reality check! We are fearfully and wonderfully made, and if we do like David and preach to our souls a little, I think there is a lot we can overcome that sadly has been overcoming us!

Today I got my number for my race bib, and because I'm so spiritual and love to over-spiritualize everything, I googled to see if there was a bible verse with my numbers, and no there isn't, it's too high of a number, so I immediately turned to Strong's... cuz not only am I super spiritual, I try and be super smart... I'm so kidding guys, you know me well enough, right??
Ok so I looked up both the Hebrew for 3681 and the Greek and check it out...

In the Greek it's reproach, that's a fun word! Where is this heading?? But as I read the verse it began to illuminate something for me!

Luke 1:25- "The Lord has done this for me," she said. "In these days he has shown his favor and taken away my disgrace (reproach) among the people."

WOW! This one really spoke to me! I feel like God has really used my training in running to be a part of the process of Him removing my reproach or disgrace. Before I learned to beat my body into submission (1st. Cor. 9:27,) there was a huge part of me that has felt like a disgrace, I felt defeated by my lack of discipline and disgusted by my lack of self control! I'm praising God for this verse that He is dealing with me graciously and removing my disgrace by retraining me to be a more disciplined and self-controlled woman...

Next in the Strong's Hebrew is the word "covering" the uses of the word is kinda funny... I think they are talking about using the skins of sea cows to cover parts of the tabernacle... haha, sea cows!

But immediately I felt the Lord encouraging me that He will be my covering in this race, and when I get tired or feel like giving up, I'm gonna encourage my self with this, that He's got me covered!

So wish me.... luck?... blessings... I dunno... Wait I do! Pray for me, I'm gonna need it!

-Your Old Time bestie...

Hope

As life has been forging on full steam ahead, I have been really impacted by how many of my friends are struggling.
And I don't mean can't find the right pair of shoes to match that dress kind of struggle, I mean a possible terminal illness, a possible terminal marriage and one that's definitely over...

If you have a set of eyes and a heart that's pumping, it won't take much to look around you and see someone who's struggling with something.

Where do you go with this? what's your response, what kind of advice do you give?

In the last couple of months I've been pursuing training for a half marathon and to further inspire myself, I've been watching Biggest Loser. Last night on the show one of the contestants lost his brother to cancer and I couldn't help but squirm as the trainers offered life advice, that to me seemed so hollow and contrived. Maybe I'm biased, but it seems that death makes it so clear that humanistic advice falls flat, because it doesn't solve the problem of eternity! Getting in the gym and giving it all you've got for your brother doesn't really solve that he's gone forever and there's a deep loss and grief that accompanies such losses!

So the question is... how do you deal with catastrophic loss? To what or whom do you turn to, do you hope in?

I think we are such interesting creatures, in the things we turn to convinced that they're gonna solve our problems! Seriously I think there's quite a few of us that have thought ice cream will at least soothe our woes...

But the bottom line is that the power of positive thinking, ice cream or a really intense workout can only temporarily distract us, it doesn't solve the problem of pain and ultimately death!

Hebrews 2:15 says that Jesus came to deliver those who are subject to bondage of the fear of death!
That's encouraging news!

Furthermore, when we put our hope and trust in Him, pain is no longer a useless nuisance that we strive to numb. It's a tool in a Master-Craftsman's hand! This is pain that produces something even more beautiful than gold! The bible says it's endurance, which leads to character, which ends up producing HOPE! (Rom.5:4)

And when it's Jesus that we put our hope in there is a peace, it's not a peace that the world can offer us! The hope the world offers is empty... sorry but it is... It's only something Jesus can give us, He says "don't let your heart be troubled or afraid..." And just before his followers were about to be scattered because of the threat of death, He encourages them to take heart because He has overcome the world! I don't know about you, but when you're facing the threat of death someone chanting "yes you can" isn't gonna cut it!
It has to be someone who has overcome death who can actually offer me some encouragement in that moment! Everything else falls flat!

1st Peter 1 says that we have been grieved by various trials for a little while... I don't know about you, but 80 years plus or minus to be grieved by various trials doesn't seem like a little while, especially when those trials can seem so overwhelmingly huge and painful! But I heard a pastor put it this way recently...
"When we're on year 10billion 800million 465 thousand and 2... 80 years is gonna seem like a recess in 1st grade!"

It's perspective we need! The bottom line friends... God is real, life is short and eternity is long!

I know it's hard, I'm weeping with you, I'm praying for you...

I'm hoping that you place your hope in the only one who is worthy of your trust!
He died for you to rescue you from the most hopeless of situations and He has promised to never leave you or forsake you! Romans 5:5 says that that hope you have in Him will not disappoint you!

Lord help us to fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen! Knowing that through our pain and difficulty you are working out a far greater weight of glory! Help us to surrender to You as You work it out! Help us Lord to suffer well, as we hope in you!

Please let me know how I can pray for you if you're going through a difficult season!
- Your Old Time friend

He is Risen! He is Risen Indeed!

Because it's Easter I have to start by saying... I love Jesus and I'm so thankful that He died for my sins, and I'm so grateful that He conquered death and that I get to spend eternity Him!

And in light of that, I must share with you one song that I love and the rest which are completely ridiculous!

My most favoritist Easter song growing up... Keith just knew how to do it right, and somehow as a teenager my friends and I all that he was sooooo cool! Weird right?! But I'm so glad, cuz he wrote some of the most amazing lyrics of all times!

So here he is doing the Easter Song



This isn't a song, but it's pretty important if you know what my schedule is like and like to laugh at strange men pretending to be church ladies... It's called church slave... please don't be too offended ;)


This one is AMAZING! Ska, ska, ska Jesus! I love how cheesy Christians can be... we're awesome! "Beautiful Sal, Beautiful"


I hope you have a wonderful Easter! And enjoyed a few laughs... I know Jesus wouldn't mind ;)
He is risen!!!!!! He is risen indeed!

It's a good Good Friday!

Well as you can see, my posting marathon didn't last all that long.. I need to get my blogging endurance up! This week has been one of the busier weeks of my life, but all for a good reason.

As you probably know today is Good Friday, the day my Savior died for my sins!

I just got home from leading the music for our church's service, and I had to write to you all... Tonight was so important, so central, so key... In some ways I cringe thinking about this day... but I'm glad in a way, I never want to take His sacrifice lightly.

I spent a large portion of my day reflecting on what my life would have been like, if He hadn't been willing to die, it's unimaginable! I thought about the grief that He had to bear on my account. It was a hard day a sober day...

A lady from my church died today, largely because of a extremely self-destructive sin...

I hate my sin and how it hurts the people I love and how hard it is to free myself from it's grip. It's so costly, so painful!

As I went to post this picture, I definately hesitated, the cross is so grusome, and if I look at it, I'd rather Jesus wasn't still on it... But I think it's really good for us to remember how much it cost Him to buy us back from death!

If you're still reading, I'm praying that you are having a better than good Good Friday, knowing that Sunday's comin'!

And in light of that... I've posted some of my most favorite quotes on the Gospel... I hope you are encouraged!

*The gospel: "God covering his naked enemies, bringing them to the wedding feast & then marrying them rather than crushing them." - Ed Welch

*Religion says "we're the good guys, and they're the bad guys" The Gospel says "We're all the bad guys, and Jesus is the ONLY good guy" - Mark Driscoll



*'If you believe what you like in the gospels, and reject what you don't like, it is not the gospel you believe, but yourself.” - Saint Augustine

*'God writes the Gospel not in the Bible alone, but also on trees, and in the flowers and clouds and stars.” -Martin Luther

*“It is true that every day has its own evil, and its good too. But how difficult must life be, especially farther on when the evil of each day increases as far as worldly things go, if it is not strengthened and comforted by faith. And in Christ all worldly things may become better, and, as it were, sanctified. Theo, woe is me if I do not preach the Gospel; if I did not aim at that and possess faith and hope in Christ, it would be bad for me indeed, but no I have some courage.”
-Vincent van Gogh (wow!)

*"Behold the man upon the cross, my sin upon His shoulders, ashamed I hear my mocking voice call out among the scoffers. It was my sin that held Him there, until it was accomplished, His dying breath has brought me life, I know that it is finished!" -Stuart Townsend

*"He was weeping n the garden while we wer sleeping under a tree. His discomfort for our comfort. Oh the shame. Oh the grace! " @jonathan_dodson

*"Either Jesus was who he said he was-the Messiah-or a complete nutcase. I mean nutcase on the level of Charles Manson."-Bono @krafto

*"Golgotha is not a suburb of Jerusalem "- John Piper

*“The debt was so great, that while man alone owed it, God alone could pay it.”- Anselm

*"The Tomb is not an Entrance to Death,but 2 life. The moment we take our last Breath on Earth,we take our first breath in Heaven." @greglaurie

Have a super blessed weekend!

Holy Moly Matrimony!

OK so I've thrown out more than my fare share of dares... and rhymes, on this blog....
But this is my ultimate throw down challenge... I quadrillion dog dare you to grab your spouse and listen to these two messages... AND if by some chance you're single and not a stay and home mom and read my blog.... I implore you to listen to these messages before you make a choice about whom you marry! (don't they look supremely happy!)

Trial - Marriage and Men (you won't be sorry! WOAH! that's all I can say about this one)

Trial - Marriage and Women

If, wait, when you listen, let me know what you think!

Helping the homeless

You may remember that I mentioned in a previous post that my family and some friends of mine went to hang out with and feed the homeless of Laguna on Christmas day last year.
We all had such an awesome time hanging out and talking and getting to know these guys and their stories that I said, I don't wanna wait till next Christmas to do this again!
So my awesome community group has volunteered to go with us to do another pancake breakfast this Saturday morning. And even better this time, we're gonna cook em up fresh in the back of our friend's jeep.

There is so often mixed emotions when it comes to the homeless of this world, we can feel so conflicted about their plight, seeing their suffering and wanting better for them but frustrated, by not knowing if they're being lazy or wanting someone else to do the work for them.

Well I came across this really awesome encouraging story this morning and I wanted to share it with you...

"During World War II, a little church in Strasburg France was bombed by the German Luftwaffe. When the war concluded, the people in the community cleared away the rubble, and found a statue of Jesus, the base of which was inscribed with these words: Come unto Me, all ye that are weary. It was remarkably preserved except for both hands, which had been destroyed. Hearing of this, the sculptor whose work it was immediately offered to replace the hands. But the pastor wisely declined.
And so it was that the statue was returned to its original position in front of the Church, but with a new inscription which read: He has no hands on earth but ours, for we are His Body. It’s true.
We are the Body of Christ. If Jesus is going to reach out and touch a lame person — a beggar, a hurting individual — it will be through our hands. He will use us."

But hang on just a minute before you decide where I going with this...

I think for years there has been a cultural guilt that we can feel when we see a homeless person. We can do one of two things, throw 20$ bucks at them, or turn up our radio and pretend we didn't see them.

But I feel as I'm maturing, it's not about guilt anymore, and it's not whether that person is deserving or not.

Let's look at Jesus for a moment... The guy was constantly surrounded by needs, everywhere he went we're broken people and usually someone asking to be healed... and he was constantly accused of being a winebibber, glutton and friend of sinners, but never of being frazzled or too busy.

Jesus simply did what the Father asked Him to, and that's why Jesus' yoke is easy and His burden is light (Matt. 11:28-30)

We were never meant to fix all of this world's problems on our own, but as we see what Jesus has so graciously done for us, hopefully that love will compel us to be obedient when we hear the Father saying, "you've got a few extra bucks, I want you to buy that guy a meal..."

So the moral of the story is, when you're willing to do what God has asked you, your burden will be light, you won't be weighed down by the plight of others, but simply excited to reciprocate the great love that has been lavished on you. I don't feel like I have to be His hands and feet any more, I'm just so excited that I get to be!

We'll be on Forest Ave. Saturday morning at 8:30 if His love is compelling you to join ;)

Religion Saves!???

As I have told you in the past, I am not a proficient reader, just ask my Cute Kiwi, I have about 10 books next to my bed that have bookmarks about one forth of the way through. I'm just a sleepy reader, but I have finished almost every audio book I've ever "read". Mainly because someone else read it to me and maybe because I wasn't lying down in bed at 10pm...

So this month christianaudio.com is giving away Religion Saves: And nine other misconceptions by Mark Driscoll for FREEEEEEEEEEEE (to be said in the voice of the mattress comercial guy)
I have listened to quite a few messages from this series and I think this book could be life changing. I love Mark Driscoll's no nonsense approach, if you know me at all , this will not be surprising.... ahhh
It's amazing how easy it is for us to form misconceptions about what we believe, I think most of the time because we don't give it the time and study it deserves...
So check it out! Even if you're not a Christian! This might give you a clearer picture of what it is Jesus wants his church to be like.... and hey, even if you're and old timey believer, check it out too, you never know maybe you've had a misconception or 2 yourself ;)
Happy listening!

Give more presence this year!

I love how in life you go through seasons, and you don't have to be stuck with those feathered bangs or shoulder pads for the rest of your life! Thank God for that! Or roller blades, seriously, remember how crazy people were over those things! OK and remember finger watches! What the heck! There's a huge list of less than meaningful crapola that we've all purchased, so I won't beat you up with it (treasure trolls) here... but I will say that I'm super thankful that in this season of my life I'm so over being a consumer. Maybe it took the economy taking a turn for the worse, or maybe it was my Cute Kiwi saying to me (way before the recession hit), " you never really need anything, you just want something new." Oh man, was he so right! Or maybe it was God graciously showing me my pile of "good intended for others" next to my pile of "what you ended up spending on yourself." Not sure if you got the picture, but the later pile was huge in comparison... woops...

I'm sure there's a ton of you out there that are actually way more anti-consumerism than I am and could kick my well meaning little butt, but you gotta start somewhere and I'm gonna try to remove the woops from my spending vocabulary. I think I'm finally where it's not all about what I should do to be a good girl, it's actually what I wanna do, I'm growing up I guess. I'm enjoying so much what God has done for me in my life and the life of my family, that I don't wanna focus on myself as much, the things Jesus has asked me to do in His word I want to do because His love compels me! I guess the simple equation for me is "less time spending = more presence I can give" And no that is not a typo, the older I get the more I realize my possessions can be a burden, and it's not more stuff that we need. We being those in the western world wealthy enough to have a computer and Internet subscriptions to read this by... but what we need to give is time spent, being present in others lives, or it's actually giving to someone who is poor and in need. That's the stuff that's gonna last a lot longer than that laser pointer you just had to have!
So as you watch this video, which I hope you do, I hope it won't spark condemnation, but true gratitude for what He has given, and I hope you'll find joy in giving presence this Christmas season!

If you're looking for any ideas on way's you can give presence this year go to http://www.rethinkingchristmas.com and check out some of their great ideas!
And I hope it's clear I'm not trying to make anyone feel guilty for spending money! Cuz let's face it, a coupon for a massage for Aunty Mable just wont cut it. But I do want to encourage everyone to think about stepping outside of consumerism, to be thoughtful about different meaningful ways you can give and bottom line: to enjoy doing it!

bye for now

Free Books Yippee!

So I told you a few months ago about a free book on Christian Audio.com called Crazy Love, and I have to say, and I know I'm no book critic, but it is one of thee best books on Christian living I've ever read. I was challenged to my core and so encouraged, but it's not free anymore, but whatever it cost, buy it, you'll thank me.

BUT there is another awesome book for free this month called Desiring God, Meditations of a Christian Hedonist by John Piper... Click Here to check it out, what do you have to lose... it's free and someone will read it to you! win, win!
Just doin' my part to get you cool free stuff... check ya later.

20 Second Testimonies

So I have been off the blogosphere radar for a little while now, with my computer crashing, my ministerial duties and a my children's god-parents in town from New Zealand it's been CRAZY! Seriously I think I'm making use of every single minute in the day to maximize my potential as super mom, it's really ridiculous, and I'm happy to say won't be carrying on this way forever!


BUT all that is to say, I couldn't wait to get online this morning and share with you all this new little "activity" (thanks Speeds) that I came up with.... I called it a game and I was reminded by my dear friend Speeds after we had completed my game that really it was an activity... so the idea... I think lots of us struggle with how to cultivate a culture where we talk about our faith and what God is doing in our lives freely, so I came up with 20 second testimonies.... Hebrews 10:23-25 was my inspiration...



Hebrews 10:23 NLT - Without wavering, let us hold tightly to the hope we say we have, for God can be trusted to keep his promise. 24 - Think of ways to encourage one another to outbursts of love and good deeds. 25- And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage and warn each other, especially now that the day of his coming back again is drawing near.


So next time you're in a group setting or even one on one with someone, ask your friends to share in 20 seconds a neat story of God's power in their lives or a lesson that they've been learning recently. It's really a non threatening way to share what God has been doing in their lives... any one can manage 20 seconds... right? And most people once they get going can offer way more than 20 seconds... It's so important to build up one another and I think we can get really cynical and doubt God sometimes, but when we hear what He's doing in our friends lives, it can be so encouraging... Soooo stir it up... get the love and the faith flowing! Have the courage to present your friends with 20 second testimonies... you'll be so blessed and you'll help your friends remember what it's really all about!

Let's be real!

So I'm a girl who's committed to being transparent and I think in most situations I'm pretty uncomplicated, but I know for some people I can be overwhelming, which is sometimes complicated, but here's the deal, I like to be real and I love people who are willing to be also!

My sweet Mum-in-law is here visiting from New Zealand and we we're talking about a certain trend in where Mom's and wives can maybe give off the impression that they are accomplishing a little more that what's realistic... I mean who can make all their meals for the day from scratch in their perfectly gleaming house with a baby on thier hip and the other arm tied behind there backs (that's hard, I wouldn't recommend trying this) while they sew their 6 children's clothes without a pattern ;) ... and I'm not saying they can't do it, but are we being real here?

I'm not saying I don't like it when my friends jokingly call me Betty Crocker or Martha, but I don't ever want to give off the wrong impression that it's soooo easy and that I don't need any help... Let's face it, if you happen to be invited to the Weeks' for supper, I WILL have thought about what I'm gonna make for days and I will have spent extra time cleaning up my house than usual and I will spend most of that day preparing for you to come over... and hopefully I won't act like that's how we roll everyday...
I do have a really sweet friend, Janell and with her there's no pretense, if you're invited over your gonna eat what their family would eat every night and the house is gonna be like it always is, and I LOVE that about her, I love being invited over to be part of the family!

Now that doesn't mean that I'm pretensious, I just like to put my energy into making it really special for people to come over... It's an outlet for me I guess...

So I'm letting the cat out of the bag, I can't write 10 blog posts a day, bake fresh bread, make chicken piard for dinner and sew 5 slings in a day while doing crafts with my perfectly behaved children... Not saying that I wouldn't love to! I wish there was 50 hours in a day, I'd rule the world! But since that's not likely to happen I just have to pick and chose from day to day where my energy's spent and some days that's on cleaning and other's it on blog posts or sewing... but I just wanna keep it real for all you moms out there, we can't do it all... so don't feel like you have to convince everyone that you can! I mean I love the idea of the perfect 50's housewife, but she doesn't really exist, only in our imaginations...

Just keepin' it real...

There's purpose in the pain

Why is it that the moment trails begin I forget everything I've learned that 's gotten me this far... it's like the pain or frustrations somehow block out that really important part of my brain that could reassure me that every thing's gonna be OK and there is a purpose in all this ...

Some of my friends have mildly accused me of living a charmed life, it's true I have never lost a relative that's really close to me, I've never really experienced any hardship due to financial woes or real sickness and for the most part my husband and I kinda like each other... So we've established that I don't have the market cornered on suffering but they say that suffering is relative, so in my small puny way I can understand what it's like to struggle. And for the last couple of months I can say a little better I know what it's like to struggle.
Since having my sweet dream of a little boy, I've been struggling with my health, and more than anything, it's been messing with my head. I really didn't realize how much I took my health for granted until this all went down...

But that's not really the point of this post... the point is, where do we go when the pain or frustrations start?

For a lot of us it's worry for others it's anger, I'm sure there's a whole host of emotions that we face when we feel out of control of our circumstances... but thankfulness is not one that quickly comes to mind.

For years, when these trails rear their ugly heads, an old stand by of mine has been Hebrews 10. Here the author reminds the recipients of this letter how they went through great suffering in the first days after they were illuminated... he says, "hey you've gotten through rougher patches before, you just have need of endurance, that's why you're going through this." He encourages them to not cast away their confidence in God, because in their confidence they will find great reward. And isn't that true, have you ever taken the high road? Have you ever buckled down and just decided to have a good attitude and trust that good is gonna come out of your difficult circumstance? I'd love to hear your story and what you gained from your positive stance!
I'm sounding like the opposite of Debbie Downer here... we could call me "Polly Positive" but it is bigger than that, I hope this doesn't sound like a glorified pep talk.
I really do believe that there is a valuable spiritual discipline here that a lot of us forget about when the trouble starts...

1Peter 1 reminds us that we only are grieved by trails if we need them... they prove our faith, they show us what we really believe, and what is it that I believe when I'm going through tough times? If I'm really honest, it's that I'm the master of my destiny and I need to get control of the situation and quick... and I can have a real stinky attitude that can sound like this... "seriously! this is so inconvient, how am I gonna write 10 blog posts a day, make my cake pops, sew 15 slings and be the perfectly attentive mom now that I have to deal with this!"

So lately I've been trying to skip that step and go straight to realizing that I am a toothless tiger in the face of roaring trials and simply just give thanks! This time I'm thankful that God is taking me to a new level of discipline. And that is something I know I would never achieve with out the help of difficult circumstances! Seriously I have to laugh that God has figured out a way to "trick" me into being disciplined! I love Him for that! I love the fruit of being disciplined just not the general discomfort it requires...So I can recognize that this trial is doing some work for me that I might not otherwise be able to to accomplish, so for that I can give thanks!

On a more serious note 1st Thessalonians 5:18 tells us that the will of God for our lives is that we give thanks in everything! And yes, that does mean everything... even when our husband might leave, when our dog might die, when the lump is diagnosed malignant, or when we're losing it all... give thanks!
Please don't misunderstand me, I really don't mean to trivialize anyone's pain, if anything I mean to validate it! There is purpose in the pain, I just pray I can encourage you to grasp it's full potential...

I remember a time about 9 years ago when I had just given my life back to the Lord and I was sooooo broken! Oh man, we're talkin' ugly broken, nose swollen, snotty sobbin', mascara runnin' broken! I can just remember falling on my knees and saying thank you Lord, I don't understand why you're allowing this but I'm gonna say thank you just the same... Woah! Overwhelming peace like I've never experienced before... still ugly broken, but I had peace. And that's what God promises us! A peace that surpasses our understanding . And I can understand it now, I'm so thankful I'm not that same girl I was 9 years ago, but at the time the pain was so deep, so real I couldn't understand why I had to go through it.

So the bottom line.......... don't be discouraged, don't let those thoughts of worry or anger get out of control... be like David and preach to your soul, remind yourself of God's goodness and give thanks for whatever it is...
2nd Corinthians reminds us that our light affliction is only momentary and working out for us something far greater than we could ever imagine! Remember we're just passing through, this is not our home! Let's give thanks and give purpose to our pain!

And please, let me know if I can pray for you if you're going through a difficult time and if you have a story of giving thanks through hard circumstances please feel free to share!

Grace and Peace!

That's what it's all about! - Clap! Clap!

So, the average person who lives to be 70, will have spent 20 years of his life sleeping, 6 years eating (at least 8 years, if your name is Cyndi), 5 years dressing(ok add another year if your name is Cyndi, I have a problem picking out just the right outfit, which always ends up being wrong anyways, why do I bother), 2 years on the telephone, 3 years waiting, and 5 months tying shoes. I'm not even gonna mention the years spent online...

So we all jump in and say "That's what it's all about, clap-clap!"


WHAT????


In my devotional time this morning the simple verse "the just shall live by faith" opened up a super jumbo sized can of worms for me... these 6 little words are so freeing and uncomplicated, but for some reason I prefer "the extra complicated with a slice of difficult on the side please."


'I marvel that you have left the gospel of grace — the unearned, undeserved, unmerited favor of God — just so you can get all tangled up in rules and regulations.' I loosely quote from Paul...

I don't know how it is for most of you, but I spend a large portion of my day worried about what I'm doing or not doing that is pleasing or not pleasing God... I set my own traps and fall into them regularly. And it's a gluey sticky mess that's not easy to free myself from... Seriously is this what it's all about? Is this the life that I was promised when I first believed?


"So Christ has really set us free. Now make sure that you stay free, and don't get tied up again in slavery to the law. Listen! I, Paul, tell you this: If you are counting on circumcision (or rules and regulations) to make you right with God, then Christ cannot help you. " Gal. 5:1-3

Woops! how did I get here again? Relying on all the "good" stuff I do, feeling like "I've got it going on, I'm all good". When I really break it down it's actually a little bit comical how I think the "good" stuff I do for God is actually "good". It's a little like when Emmy proudly cleaned up her pee on her carpet yesterday by taking a tea towel, dipping it into the toilet then proceeding to "clean up her mess" with an extra-large sized smile... yeah... that was good. YUCK!

In light of Emmy's example, I'm surprised how easily I jump right into playing this game... I put my whole self in...

And soon we can become Judiazers... FYI the Judaizers if you didn't know where the people that said it was impossible to be right with God with out having your foreskin cut off... woah!

I can start looking a little too close at people, and the private parts of their lives and I can hurt them — not love, embrace and bless them. I become self-righteous, and look at others saying, ‘ If they'd only read their bibles they wouldn't be in this predicament? Why do they that watch that junk? What’s wrong with them?’ Hypothetically of course... ;) I would never, I could never, Ok I do, but I wanna pretend I don't.... I'm sorry!

Then suddenly I blow it, I don't keep my own rules and standards that I think I need to to be right with God and I'm up a creek without a paddle, and I think to myself... "self, what we're you thinking, you've blown it and this one's gonna be hard to work out with God, He's gonna be disappointed in what a loser you are"

We put ourselves in the pressure cooker that for so many of us is the Christian experience, which is either that of a self-righteous jerk who goes around inspecting other people's privates— which we all know we have NO business doing!!!! Or one who lives in the doldrums, trying to escape the slimy walls of the deep deep pit we dug for ourselves.


Up and down, up and down, get me off this crazy thing Jane!


The just shall live by faith.

‘Lord, it's all done, there's nothing more to add. All the junk I've done— past, present, and future, are forgiven. I can come to You anytime I want to. I don’t have to prove to You that I'm spiritual. I don't have to do this or get rid of that. Lord, I can just love You and appreciate the Cross — and I’m free...

There's no middle ground with God, I LOVE that about Him!

No matter how many good things I do, He's not gonna love me more and no matter how many times I blow it today he's not gonna love me less!!!

YES! That's what it's all about, so I'm gonna put my whole self in and shake it all about today as I rejoice that I live by faith, nothing more nothing less, I belive and that means I'm free!

Clap! Clap!

Heart Condition

So in the light of yesterday's inventory check, I decided first on my agenda this morning should be some time with the Lord. Then I proceeded to totally disregard that and went directly to my computer... sigh... But thankfully the Lord helped me pull the reigns in and I went Here ...
if I can't beat my clear addiction to this uncomfortable computer chair, I might as well spend some time with the Lord whilst sitting upon it.

I was so encouraged and really convicted. One of the many problems I seem to have is it's way easier for me to intellectualize my faith, than to open my heart completely to it. I don't know why, I wish I was one of those people that just opened their heart easily and held nothing back. But for some reason when I'm in busy seasons like the one I'm in now, I've noticed that I start to withhold my heart from the Lord. That's so sad to type... I guess in these times I find comfort in how logical my faith is to me and how I know in my mind so well what I believe...
... and they sent forth Barnabas, that he would go as far as Antioch. Who, when he came, and had seen the grace of God, was glad and exhorted them all, that with purpose of heart they would cleave unto the Lord. Acts 11:22-23
But God hasn't asked me to cleave to Him with my mind, but with the deepest parts of me... So I spend a few moments reflecting and there I am... thoughts of all He's done for me, all those amazing times He's come through in just the right way. I guess this is why we need to be still, so we can remember who He is and all He's done. This modern world competes for my affections, and keeps me so busy. I'm sorry Lord that I let it!
So for today.... everytime I'm tempted to relate to the Lord from meerly the intellectual side, I'm gonna stop and reflect on why and how I can change that... I gotta get this heart condition under control!



P.S. if you're wondering where these bizarre pictures are coming from... don't worry there's plenty more where this came from... "Your bible and You" is great resource for eccentric faith based images from the 50's... It totally wasn't the Mormons that came up with these first, they knew a good thing when they saw one!

What you value the most

Today my cute Kiwi came home from church "totally stoked on the awesome message..." he's so California ;)

Note: I was at home attending to my sweet little sicky, she has a 102 fever, poor girl

Anyways he shared with me some of the highlights, but the thing that stuck with me the most, yes some things he shares DO stick...

Was our pastor suggested asking our children what they think we value the most, I suspect if Emmy could understand and I aksed her today, she'd say nursing that baby and sitting in front of that computer... ouch! on the last one mainly...

It really hit me that if I want my kids to love Jesus, it needs to be completely evident to them, how much I do...
so quick inventory of time spent... ehhhh, need to get back to my regular quality time with the Lord and I guess letting my kids know that the little things I do around the house for them and Papa are for the Lord too... because that IS what I value the most.